Can I say how happy I am that the sun will not rise again in this year?
I decided that I am not going to rehash every awful thing, every life altering moment, every heartbreaking circumstance that we've encountered this year. That seems mostly useless and completely depressing. And while I'm fairly certain that there is a strong possibility that some of those thoughts will creep into my head as it hits my pillow tonight, and fairly certain that my pillow might be drenched in tears before my dreams arrive, I'm also fairly certain that this day will be a great going away party for Oh-Eight. Because I am going to squeeze every last drop of love and laughter that I can out of Oh-Eight. (Because Oh-Eight, you owe me big time.)
We started the day off with homemade chocolate chip muffins and yummy cappuccinos. And then the kiddos watched a movie while I sipped more coffee and read.
And then Gabe, sweet Gabe who's been asking to take pictures all morning, in the middle of the movie looked back across the room at me and said
"Mom, that looks like peace."
"You, with your coffee and reading. You look like peace."
So I am thankful for that.
I am thankful for my amazing kids and their amazing ability to see things and say things that pull me out of dark places.
I am thankful that in this year of heartbreak and loss there has been grace and growth.
The rest of this day will be spent in our new home, playing new games and taking new pictures and making new memories.
Goodbye Oh-Eight. You kind of sucked and you will not be missed. You almost pushed me over the edge. And though some of the change you brought was necessary, I almost lost myself in you…
But I didn't.